A very subjective look into AWFC

I’m not Sherlock Holmes, in case you were wondering, but I have been reading AWFC and AFC Twitter the past few days and the amount of frustration, confusion and lack of patience is absolutely staggering. So, I case you need to hear this: please take a deep breath and relax. There is so much noise about this or that player and I totally get it.

One thing to keep in mind is that say, with a England international that rhymes with “nice” he most likely signed the deal with us already but him being on international duty might just postpone. I truly believe the same thing is happening with Russo for instance. The lionesses have a match I thinnnnnnnk July 1st or 2nd which is around the corner so why make it a big deal. They might wait until the WC for all we know.

I guess what I’m saying is that we can’t lose sight of this all being an interesting chess match among many players… Clubs, players, PR, social media, press, etc etc etc. And we are all either playing the actual match or we’re in the crowd, playing a very active role. Or maybe not… maybe everybody knows exactly what is happening and when and we just think we know what we’re talking about.

Something similar happens in music. I’ve worked with massive pop artists and you go on twitter and they say that so and so are in some tropical island with X person and they are literally sitting in front of you in some steakhouse outside of Chicago drinking an Arnold Palmer with you. Nobody really knows anything but they also might know things and it’s hard to prove to people that we know things and also what’s the point? If we know we know and that should be enough. Right?

People love to talk and they don’t really know. And moreover people love to read and listen to people that like to talk. And that is not a criticism, this is coming from someone who has a blog, 2 podcasts and a YouTube channel.

I honestly have no idea what I’m talking about.

Have a great Monday.

d ❤

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This past Thursday I went to see one of my favorite bands of all time. I hadn’t seen Ours since way 2019 while I happened to be on tour in Chicago and had a night off and they just so happened to be playing about 20 min away. I first started listening to them in the spring of 2001when I was in college in Boston and I have had the pleasure of seeing them many, many times. This time was extra special though.

The first show I saw them at was at a venue called The Paradise Rock Club and I ran into a few friends from college there. I don’t quite remember if I knew they were fans or found out then… The band wasn’t well known but it’s one of those that whenever you meet a fellow fan it’s almost as if a magical bond is made and you instantly feel understood and that you’re not alone. Anyway, it was a magical show where they played their debut album “Distorted Lullabies” in its entirety.

Fast forward to a few days ago, 2023… 22 years after that iconic show, I went to the world famous Viper Room on the Sunset strip in Hollywood. The place was packed. I walked around to try to find a decent place to watch the show from, since I’m 5′ 7″ and need unobstructed views wherever I go 😂. I make my way all the way around towards the bathrooms but the view just sucks. I give up and make my way back towards the bar, which I’m hesitant about because I don’t drink and I don’t wanna just stand there. But as I’m gently pushing my way through the crow I see 2 old friends and my heart almost exploded. Not just any 2 friends, but 2 of the friends I saw Ours back in 2001 with. It was so emotional to be there in and of itself, but to watch the show with them, all those years later, was truly magical for me.

These friends of mine were among the first members of the LGBTQ+ community that I had ever met. I was 19 years old, had just left Caracas and was living on my own in a different country and was exposed to so many things. These 2 friends were part of an amazing group of people that were truly unique and unapologetic, authentic, kind, loving na just badass women. I fell in love with the idea of supporting them and their struggles and I related much more to them than other people. No, I’m an NOT saying that my “struggles” could compare to those of the community, no no no. What I mean is that I liked them much more and because I did I wanted to be there for them, and back then I didn’t even know I was doing it. Those formative years, core memory years, cemented my love for the LGBTQ+ community, and to this day its a massive part of who I am and why I love what I love.

How does this relate to Arsenal Women? I’m about to tell you. And actually there are 2 ways.

On one hand, I am guilty of gatekeeping in a way. The idea of the growth of the women’s game is something I absolutely love and want to happen. At the same time, I have this stupid apprehension of us singing American players just so that we have a new massive fan base. It’s dumb… it doesn’t bother me when other nationalities sign. But anyway… that might be because of the USWNT beating The Netherlands in the WC final but anyway…. I feel that as a fan of certain bands, like Ours, I’m also guilty of gatekeeping. Its like they are MY band, my own little secret…

The main reason is what I mentioned about embracing diversity. Me being open all these years have made me be so open to being a part of the women’s football world. I’d like to think that even without my friends at the Ours show all those years ago, I would still love my gay, lesbian and trans friends, and they just added to that. And I love them and I love it.

d ❤

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No, I’m not talking about anything other than this blog interface being super weird. I’ve tried refreshing the page, restarting my laptop and anything/everything I can do try to figure this out. It started happening a couple of days ago and when I tried to write something this morning, it was just very difficult to navigate and it still is. So, to be completely honest with you I was super inspired this morning but I was so frustrated that I deleted the blog altogether and I don’t even remember what it was about.

One interesting thing, if I can call it that, is how twitter is melting over transfer speculations. What’s funny is how ill informed these accounts are and I’m not being mean, you can just see their feed and know they weren’t correct about anything basically ever, or they talk about a transfer that is so blatantly clear, known and obvious that its not actual news. Some accounts, even some adjacent to the club, absolutely love having their followers and minions hang on to their every word. They know about the transfer but they can’t say anything about it so they pretend to not know and tease people. It’s pretty interesting and by interesting I mean that its a great reminder to not be like that.

There are 3 people I trust more than anyone in the sport: Shebahn, Suzy Wrack and Caroline Barker. If they’re talking about anything, I’m listening. And I’m truly listening to everything it’s said, how and when.

If it’s not them I’m only waiting to the official announcement.

With that said, I know about a transfer for the men’s squad that is supposed to be speculation but it’s already done.

So, don’t trust me either.

Or…?

d ❤

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As you can imagine, at one point in any drum student’s journey the concept of time keeping is spoken about. Also, sooner or later most people tell drummers how they are tasked with keeping the tempo. Their main responsibility is to keep a steady beat, to not slow down or speed up and there’s also the idea that they are meant to be followed always. And I gotta tell you, that as a drummer, this is not something I agree with. Of course us drummers are tasked with rhythm and that implies repetition and a steady tempo as much as possible but the idea that it is only up to us is very unmusical. The entire band has to at the very least be aware of the tempo and contribute to the overall auditive picture we’re trying to paint.

This is a very simplified way to explain it but some people know where the tempo is and they play a little behind… some people play on top of the beat and some right on it. The trick is being aware of what we are doing and have intention behind that. A lot of this depends on what instrument you play, what kind of song it is, if there’s a singer or not, the genre, etc etc etc. The point is that everyone contributes. It’s a collective. It’s putting a lot of energy into ONE thing and it becoming something else. In music this has to be present and it also needs to manifest itself in harmony, melody, dynamics, articulation and many other dimensions, ideally all at once, as often as possible.

Sports like golf, tennis and skiing for example, tempo and rhythm are OUR responsibility, in the sense that they are usually individual sports. Such as a soloist… up there on stage by themselves, virtuoso or not, but there. Alone, exposed, vulnerable. Kind of like a penalty taker, come to think of it.

Rhythm and tempo in football are an integral part in and of themselves but its more of a collective of every other players’s tempos and rhythms. It’s wild. Ironically, in football aka a team sport, there’s usually a narrative of one player dictating the rhythm, pace and drive. I’ve said this before about Lia Walti and how I think how she plays, the whole team plays. But there’s layers to this. If she, for whatever unheard of reason, isn’t passing the ball well, this should not have any impact on how other players pass the ball.

I feel from time to time us fans, pundits and journalists lose sight of how much of a team sport this is. There’s usually a fixation on one player and their form, which is understandable for editorial and narrative issues, without a doubt. I also feel its unfair to have the focus be on someone’s absence instead of other’s presence. I understand it and I can also have some apprehension. I love the idea of players “taking over a match” but no matter the scenario they never do it on their own. There’s always other people aka it’s not about them and it’s not about us, in anything we do. We need people and we need to appreciate what they do and what they don’t do too.

d ❤

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Insert sad face emoji. Insert my actual sad face. Saying goodbye to a player like Mana is difficult as it is, let alone when they were out on loan to your bitter rivals. It’s kind of a mind f*ck isn’t it? I will remember her fondly and I truly wish/hoped she would’ve gotten more minutes but it is what it is. Things “being what they are” doesn’t mean we need to like them. Obviously she “left” last year but I never felt we actually replaced her. I also don’t feel we properly replaced Jordan either.

We also are letting Fran Stenson go and I don’t really have anything to say about that because I don’t know anything at all about her to be brutally honest. I think she might’ve played less than 3 times? maybe only 2 times?? However, I do wish I would’ve seen more of her, but again, things are what they are.

Speaking of things being what they are, I’ve been very busy with some music stuff and I won’t be able to post a podcast this week.

Now, whenever someones leaves I think it’s natural to wonder who will come in their place or just sign in general, but I am very curious if there will be some sort of exodus this summer. I hope not and I hope so in a way too. One thing is for sure: I have no idea how any of this works but I trust (hope) that the club knows what they are doing. We need to win. Kroenke’s need to win.

For those that don’t really follow the men’s team or have little recollection of Arsene Wenger, he used to have this saying about getting injured players back and how they will be “like a new signing” which was a little bit of gaslighting and I don’t love that way of thinking because of the trauma BUT I do think that in AWFC’s case this could be a thing.

And a really good thing at that.

d ❤

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If you think I’ve above talking about how delicious chicken nuggets are then you are partially wrong. I don’t eat chicken now but I used to and I still eat plant based “chickn” but whatever the point it their delicious. And yes I encourage you to try plant based food. Anyway, I’m talking about the Denver Nuggets.

In case you don’t know, Stan Kroenke owns Arsenal. He also the Denver Nuggets, who last night won the NBA Championship. Add to the teams he owns the LA Rams who won the Super Bowl in 2022 and last AND least 😂 the Colorado Avalanche who won the Stanley Cup recently. That’s 3 Championship in a row across the 3 of the 4 major sports in America. Absolute madness.

I’m not going to talk about the money, and things like that other than it is clear that there is a lot of money which means ambition which also means toxic masculinity a lot of the times, which I’m also not going to talk about. My point is that now Arsenal and Arsenal Women can be more of a focus. They’ve won it all, why not win here too? And that means investment, and lots of it. I wonder if the Kroenke’s look at what Chelsea are doing and want to match and top it. I truly hope so because everything is there. I don’t mean spend a lot for the sake of spending or to win next season and that’s it. I’m talking about consistent, steady, meaningful and intentional investment.

The first thing that comes to mind as far as investment is players right? but honestly I still feel the girls should have another stadium and more things like anything they want and need. I know I’m being silly but whatever is needed, we can afford it so let’s do it.

I am a proponent of their stand alone stadium because playing every match at the Emirates might be a logistical and groundskeeping nightmare but I honestly have no idea what I’m talking about. I love the idea of a new highbury like I’ve said in another blog and I just really hope that the Kroenke’s step up to yet another gear.

I’m not a owner’s guy and I certainly do not love the Kroenke’s specially when they had ties to a certain twice impeached, twice indicted, women abuser of an Ex-president of the USA. So no, I don’t see the as saviors or anything like that. But that’s yet another topic for another day and maybe not this blog.

d ❤

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This is nothing you don’t know. This is a very difficult sport and precisely because I know how hard it is is why I admire all the people that play this at a high level and yes, I respect women infinitely more, for infinite reasons.

Last night I had my first match in months. I hadn’t kicked a ball, I didn’t practice, I didn’t even stretch. I parked at 3:50, rushed to the sidelines, put my shinguards on, got my gk gloves, my trusty water bottle and headed to the net. Did I tell you I hadn’t kicked a ball? I also hand’t caught a ball. Nothing. And guess what? It showed! Clown city, population me.

The first goal kick I basically kicked it to their best player, I was caught out of position and he calmly slotted past me. It was terrible, lame, pathetic, funny and also great and cool and fun because it’s a zero stakes situation. My league barely keeps score and there is not even a table. It’s just for fun.However, my ego was bruised for a minute or 20 and I just don’t like not doing well at things. I choose to be a GK because all things considered I don’t actually care that much and I don’t mind being the person responsible for mistakes like the one.

Days like these make me appreciate footballers even more but beyond their ability I’m talking about the mental aspect. Being able to forget so quickly and remain confident and exercise that elite mentality. It’s absolutely incredible.

To a degree that’s what you have to do as a professional musician after a mistake or missed note, etc but the difference is that I’ve worked on this, It’s my livelihood so I don’t think about it but whenever I have to do something similar in another field such as sport it’s very, very tricky.

Of course I thought of Manu recovering after a goal scored against her, or how LWM comes back that much stronger after a set back she’s had on the pitch, or how Stina just keeps going and going and going. I hold these attitudes very close to me. The years when I was actively inspired by male footballers is long gone. At least not when I’m playing.

It’s a different thing.

d ❤

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To be completely honest, the last thing I’ve wanted to be is a YouTuber and I don’t consider myself one. It’s a role that I respect a lot and I understand the amount of work that in entails and there were are a lot of reasons why the thought of that title gave me lots of apprehension before I started. On one hand you have the amount of work that goes into it and only having done 4 videos I can tell you there’s a lot of time spent there.

However, that’s not really what is making me doubt if I should continue making videos. The real reason is not something I can share at the moment but the close second reason is the fact that it makes it all about ME aka the YouTuber and not the topic, in this case, Arsenal Women.

Once you start a channel the idea is automatically to make it grow which means numbers which also means promotion and doing whatever is tried and tested and effective. I am not really interested in that and growing just to grow is silly and the complete opposite of what my idea is and has always been which focuses on narrowcasting.

Not saying I’m going to quit, but I wouldn’t be surprised if I did and I felt like this today and wanted to share just out of respect and consideration. Also, a lot of the content that I might put out or topic I might discuss has to do with there not being any football played and who knows what I would even do during the World Cup.

But hey, this is what a blog is. A place to share thoughts and ideas and as you can imagine this particular topic and post is not the most suited for an actual podcast or video haha.

d ❤

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