A very subjective look into AWFC

I fucking love London very, very much. It’s an absolute magical city filled with so much history and relevance in so many different ways. Personally, this city means a lot to me for various reasons but the biggest one is Arsenal.

My music career has been kind enough to me to allow me to come here a few times and I’ve taken myself there on strictly footballing trips but regardless of the reason, I always make it a point to visit the stadium, and every single time, without fail, I have a very hard time controlling my emotions.

A big emotion I feel is gratitude because I never have to come to London because of something bad that has happened… it’s either on tour or because I come watch the girls play. Always a good thing and that is a privilege.

I also feel humbled because I know there are AWFC fans and AFC fans from all over the world that have never ever come anywhere near London, let alone The Emirates, so I always take a moment to sit with that and hold space for my fellow fans who cannot make it…

Normally, as soon as I walk out of my hotel I have my headphones on and I have a London/England specific playlist or artist… My first time I remember walking to the stadium listening to The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and The Spiders From Mars by David Bowie… Other times I’ve put on The Smiths, Bloc Party and of course, The Clash, duh.

Every time I’ve come I’ve ended up staying in different parts of town but this time we stayed right in Islington and I hadn’t truly seen so much Arsenal centric stuff unless I was basically in the stadium. To get on a quick tube ride and listen to Haim’s Days Are Gone album aka my favorite album by my favorite band, and to see Beth, Leah and Russo on all sorts of adverts was so surreal. I never get to see anything close to this living in Los Angeles.

I know the sport has grown, I know it in theory, but I just can never not be blown away by the popularity of our girls and to see Beth specially be featured is something that just means a lot to me as a person… The tube’s doors open at the arsenal stop and literally in front of the door I see Katie, Beath, Leah and Alessia. I just don’t know how you guys get used to it!!!!

IT’S INSANE HOW FAR OUR GIRLS HAVE COME!!!!!!

As got out of the station and walked towards the Armory, I had to hold back my tears as the songs I love so much were playing in my headphones. I walked around a desolate Emirates, which is always what happens… it’s as if the universe conspires and for periods of time it’s essentially just me and someone else at the end of the stadium. Those visuals…the magnitude of the place, seeing Steph Catley, Laia Codina, Daphne and Kim’s banners filled me with so much joy.

Someone had to be cutting onions…

On this lovely first day of February at 5:27am I can say that it’s the last show of our tour. We played in Wales last night and we’re very excited about tonight, myself specially because I cannot wait to have fish and chips on this part of England which I haven’t been to since 2010, yikes…

Also tonight our girls play in that FIFA tournament that I know nothing. What I will say is that we should be winning it not because of an arrogance thing but because every trophy we win, symbolic, real, European, domestic, international… they all matter and they all bring more success.

Finally, if you are one of those people that can come to London often or you live here, etc, please take a second to know how lucky you are.

Posted some pics on my insta @demianarriaga

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Forgive me in advance… I’m still jet lagged AF plus today was nuts. It’s 1:48am and I will make less sense than I usually do.

Today was supposed to be my first actual day off on this tour. The shows have been going great for us and we hope the crowds have felt the same. I always loved playing club shows outside of the USA and the UK never, ever disappoints. So far we’ve played in Manchester and Glasgow, both of which have had stellar crowds and local crew.

As I woke up today with all the intentions of writing about the Chelsea match and the upcoming FIFA situation, I was then jolted and halted by the lovely sound of drilling in the room next to me. There were massive construction works scheduled basically in the entire hotel and this meant that sleeping was out of the picture and so was trying to concentrate in anything other than my own breath so I didn’t go insane.

Insanity is something that I can associate with football for sure. A lot of people seem to think that the definition of that word is, and I paraphrase, “to do something the same way over and over again and expecting different results.”

News flash! That is not the actual definition. Essentially, being insane implies lacking the ability to think and behave in a rational manner. That is me. I have no idea what rational or irrational thinking is when it comes to football and the sport humbles me and proves to me that I am rarely correct. I will always be correct about Viv, DvD and Jill btw 😉

I was convinced that we wouldn’t win at Chelsea. A point maybe… but when I saw Guro Reiten start I got nervous. I wasn’t too pleased with our lineup either, and it’s not that I don’t believe in the girls, its that I have had my doubts about Renee if I’m being totally honest and I still think that these types of wins, same as with the CL last year, defy logic.

I am always positive and confident but I am also human and sometimes, following matches like the Man Utd one, we feel low and don’t think we have a shot. I think that’s normal. What is irrational? Doubting these women. Not just irrational but insane and stupid.

This is such a different situation as with the men’s team. Our girls will always bounce back and show us their true history and pedigree whereas the boys play like little boys sometimes. They should be calling Beth, Mariona, Steph and Katie every day and asking them how its like to be a winner.

Also…

I see some many experts, analysts and podcasters (the latter not being the same thing as the other two) and hell, even Renee talking about the 10 position … but you know what? You cannot separate the importance of said position from modern era Arsenal aka since Dennis Bergkamp joined the league. He changed our club forever. He was the architect of whatever standard exists now and the fact that our own fan base want a 10, on both men and women’s squads, that holds the ball up well and not provide an insane amount of assists and some goal contributions is absolutely insane. That is actually insane.

This obsession that seems to exist about the fact that because someone CAN play there doesn’t make it a viable or sustainable option. Can Katie play GK? Fuck yes she could… but should she? I would only say no because we need her at LB and not because she wouldn’t be an absolute nutter below the post.

Also Beth Mead is considerably better than Martin Odegaard and I don’t care that she doesn’t play as a 10 but she can and probably should. That’s neither here nor there.

I need to sleep.

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What I’m about to say might not be nice and I know this is really hard to hear. My assumption is that for a lot of people I will sound rather harsh and for those who agree with me, please have a seat. If you don’t see it how I do, I totally understand. Bottom line is that the club is changing, forever, and we need to appreciate the players we have this season.

Things have changed, a lot. I don’t even know where to begin and how to express all my thoughts but what I will say is that it has nothing to do with tactics, “the arsenal way” or anything like that. It’s more about the squad and the smoke and mirrors from the board.

What I see as the most glaring mistake by the club is the transfer policy basically. Specifically in the way they have sold us this idea, not just merch, that the players we’re getting are better than who we had. The club have used the unconditional love from the biggest fan base in women’s football history, to settle for something that just isn’t as good. They have exploited the idea that some players that are “one of our own” are better than they are, and we have sent the wrong players on loan. Obviously this is just my opinion.

My reality is that the club hasn’t been the same since DvD left. If you add to that Jill, Jen, Jordan and Viv just to name few, it’s normal to see how a club changes. We have been told via social media and marketing that Kim Little and Lia Walti were replaceable by players who on their best day couldn’t come close to them on their worst.

The shiny object of youth is making people blind and even “experts” are doubting Beth Mead, one of the best players ever who has more vision and quality than most players on planet earth. She’s the closest thing to a 10 we have, aside from Kim and Mariona who are playing deeper than Lia Walti ever did lol. Pelova is not a 10 and neither is Frida and even if they were, Beth is better… at everything.

She’s a better defender than Lotte Wubben Moy, can do anything Emily Fox does, better too. What the fuck is wrong with people? And I don’t care if it’s Renee who doesn’t see it… it’s clear as day. Let that woman be free but also extend her contract if you are a serious club.

My point is we fucked up with DVD, Viv, Jordan, Jill… if we’re not getting Alexia, Bonmati and players of that caliber we’re gonna be left behind. Oh wait… we’re already behind. Look at the WSL ffs … spurs might finish above us.

We need to keep Steph, Katie and Beth at all costs but we need players around them near their level, not with potential. I’ve said this for years…

I gotta go abruptly and I’m sorry but to be continued….

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So we all know that the club released a documentary about the Champions League run and win. You’d think I’d be all over it but I gotta tell you… those things are hard to watch for me. The one and only reason is because of the intensity of my emotions during that whole time and the whole season.

I can literally feel the pain on my leg from the tattoo I got shortly after they won… those things are literally engraved in me but that doesn’t come nowhere near what they feel every time they think about that run. That’s so powerful!!!!!

Just watching the little clip I saw was so triggering, in the best of ways, that I honestly don’t know how I’m going to get through the whole thing. Similar to the one about Beth and Viv which was also something that I had a bit of a hard time watching.

I do have to say that the clip I saw where Renee talks about suffering is interesting in that it pretty much goes against a lot of what I see/think/feel regarding success, happiness and art but alas football, as much as I compare to music and art, is a competition at the end of the day and as a fan, I need indeed my coach and team to do whatever they have to do and go through whatever they need to overcome, in order to become winners and make unforgettable memories.

I wonder what you all think about it… documentaries like these tend to reveal many things as far as people, processes and such while also allowing us to check our own assumptions and expectations.

Lastly and randomly, can we just talk about how good Steph Catley has been for us since she joined our club. Like WTF?? She’s been such a solid player day in and day out and she’s gonna go down as one of the most important players for our club, ever and also for Australia, no doubt in my mind.

Random but accurate.

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I had mentioned to you, my friends, that I was eventually going to write about Smilla, the posts AWFC made and. the disgusting things that were posted on instagram and X. Between my decision to write a post about it, my friend Albert (fellow AWFC fan and my co-host of the women’s show on The Highbury Squad on YouTube) sent me an article that explains everything and shares some insight in a much better way that I could ever do.

The article was written by Max Radwan, someone I don’t know and I have never read his work, or anything on Versus.uk.com before but I sure as hell will now. It is absolutely terrible that the article had to be written, honestly. It’s nauseating and if it sucks for me, and for you when you read it, just imagine how women feel, daily. Just to be clear… the article is super well written, I meant that I hate that he had to write it.

I encourage you to read the whole thing HERE

One of the takeaways is when he writes: “Women’s football does not need validation from those who reduce it to aesthetics”

Also, I just checked to read other articles and he has one about how he can’t look at Arsenal the same way after Thomas Partey, and I cannot wait to read that one either.

I wish I had answers, and suggestions but mine would be to turn off all comments all the time and to have the club quit X altogether because it is disgusting. I left that hellhole and it was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made for my mental health.

Of course, I can appreciate why certain people would feel like disabling comments wouldn’t be good, but honestly I don’t think they are that meaningful anyway… do we really need to see 187 comments wishing a player happy birthday? Do we though? Or people asking for a player’s contract renewal? Like, what do the comments actually do other than make the people who make them feel like they have some control or say?

Sounds like I’m being mean but at the end of the day I would assume that the people that look at stats and such see the numbers and engagement more than the content itself BUT to that point, they need to have someone monitor and be an active mod so that every single comment gets reviewed and deleted if needed and if someone gets mad then so be it.

Just overall the reality is that toxicity is brought up in droves, mostly by men and you can see that it is not just on the women’s game. The current arsenal fanbase has an insane agenda against Victor Gyokeres that has people going on podcasts and YouTube shows calling him fat, and that’s probably the nicest things they’ve been saying lately.

All of this just makes me gag. There are many reasons why I can’t stand the song “North London Forever”… I think it is beyond cringe but not because of the lyrics (they are fantastic and better than anything I would ever write), or because I feel that it was forced to us in an effort to have our very own “You’ll Never Walk Alone” but because I knew that some people singing it would be full of shit. Whatever the weather? Really?

If this abuse comes from within, we’re absolutely cooked as a club and fanbase.

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Just joking……………………………………? lol

I stand by what I said about the emotional / relational aspect of her of getting an extension but perhaps it is a situation where the board want to force and portray some sort of stability. Not a lot of people actually know what Clare does, and not a lot of people know what JT will do but we shall see.

The match today showed me a few things and I’m curious to see if you agree, but probably not haha.

First of all, the most important thing is that we all love KCC and we send her love and healing and all the things that we can possibly send to someone dealing with a family tragedy. My heart breaks for her and I hope she’s as ok as she can be. We know and SHE knows she is not alone but things like these are so tough. I like to think she has the best people possible for that: our squad.

It feels absurd talking about football now but I shall.

A very clear thing to me is that Dom Janssen is an absolute beast who gives ZERO f*cks about who she plays against. She had the whole team in her pocket. Goddman I love her and so wish she was at Arsenal. To think people saw her as “past it”

I think a lot of fans and content creators, etc need to show a little more respect to veteran players. Kim Little is still a monster, we’re just expecting so much… and that brings me to another thing I keep seeing and feeling and thinking… at least NOT in the WSL, if Kim and Mariona play so deep we’re absolutely fucked. There’s virtually zero threat in areas where they should control and dominate and do whatever they want. That has to change and obviously we don’t have Lia but now without KCC this is something that needs to be addressed.

Again, sending in LWM with such little time left makes no sense to me. Mind you, this isn’t about LWM because she could maybe get us a header or deflect a shot or send in one of her badass passes… it’s ZERO about her, again, I get it but also I just don’t ever like, EVER, when managers do this. We did it with Louise Quinn a few times and Ireland too. It just smells of desperation and to me it shows the opposition we are desperate.

I’ll keep this short but I’m also proven time and time again that Beth Mead is a baller. She was all over the pitch and was one of the only players that got me glued to the TV.

Lastly, and I’ll get into the whole horrendous situation re social media at a different time, Smilla Holmberg is gonna be GOOD. Looks like a great acquisition already.

Chelsea next… oddly optimistic still!!!!

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Waking up to the news that Renee had signed a contract extension was fantastic and these January days are always filled with anxiety and excitement to see who we bring in, who we move on from and anything/everything in between.

It is an overwhelming positive thing that we have this manager for the long term. She’s absolutely incredible and has brought us all more joy than we can ever comprehend and express, or at least that’s my truth. Also I have a fucking tattoo of the champions league trophy and this wouldn’t have happened without her leadership and miraculous work.

Beyond any sort of tactical nous or visionary qualities she might posses, the only thing I want and care about is for her and the players to be happy, safe, heard, respected and supported. I don’t care about wins or losses. All I would like is to know that Steph Catley, Chole Kelly, Leah, Beth and every single player in the squad and academy are SEEN and are given the peace and calm and drama free environment they deserve and that they thrive personally and not just professionally.

Renee seems like a very kind, empathetic and solid human being and I am proud of her and proud to see her as our manager. But make no mistake, we are the arsenal and at the end of the day we need to win trophies and win by playing a certain way, at that.

I don’t know much about what she wants to do squad wise, my football view isn’t that acute and I have such massive biases and strong opinions that it’s not really fair of me to criticize her for things like not playing with a 6, why she let Lia Walti go, why we haven’t bought a CB or why would ever take off Beth Mead, ever. Things like that, haha.

Overall I’m just chuffed because I know how highly she is rated not just by players but people at the club. Only good things can come from all of this as far as I’m concerned.

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One of my favorite people in women’s football is the one and only Shebahn Aherne and her sister Ruesha is not far behind. They’re both amazing and funny and they drop some truth bombs every time they post something and their latest show, specially when they talk about Beth is worth a listen…

By the way, I haven’t wanted to address some things about the amount of hate I got on an instagram post and DMs about me simply typing “justice for Ruesha” after her 5 game suspension was announced. Absolute madness.

I will at some point but in the meantime, check it out…

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